2010
16
Someone recently emailed Carmi and I with several questions about older child adoption.
Carmi answered the email but I thought it would be a good idea to post a question a day here and share our answers with you.
If you have any questions of your own, please let us know.
1. Was it hard to communicate with Zane?
2. How did he adjust to you? Siblings?
3. How did he adjust to school in America? How did you know what grade to put him in? How is he doing now in school?
4. How was he able to make friends and feel comfortable at school when he could not speak the language? How is he doing now that he can speak the language?
5. How did you try to teach him English? How is he doing now?
6. Did he go to school in China? If so, did the school teach him about Buddha and did your child have a strong connection to Buddhism?
7. Was he in an orphanage or a foster family? If in a foster family, did he have a difficult time adjusting to your family? How is he doing today?
8. Can you share something that you wish that you would have known before you adopted an older child that you can’t get from a book but only through experience?
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The simple answer is, of course, yes. It was certainly a challenge to communicate with Zane at first. He knew 3 words in English and we knew 7 in Chinese. However, you can only get so far with hello, goodbye, thank you, mother, father, sister and grandmother. But we found a way despite our bad Chinese with a southern accent.
Outside of the hotel rooms, we had an English-speaking guide with us at all times.
On those occasions when a guide was not present, we used the AM101 Electronic English Chinese Talking Translator from BBK that we purchased prior to our trip. The device translated English to Chinese and Chinese to English. It took Zane all of about 5 minutes to learn how to use it. His first words were, “I’m thirsty.” The translation either way was far from perfect. We had to really think about what we wanted to tell him and break the phrase down as simply as possible.
I would say that we also sharpened our skill at playing charades.
After we came home, Zane took the translator to school and it was very helpful to him there for the first couple of months.
Hey Doug,
I’ve been meaning to ask you guys about the translator. Our daughter will be five when we travel and I’m thinking it might not be too helpful b/c she’s so young. However, it might help when we are trying to talk to her. What do you think?
Cindy,
My gut feeling is that it would be difficult for a 5-year-old to use. But I do feel that she would be able to understand you which, in my opinion, makes the purchase worthwhile. If it didn’t work out, you could always turn around and resell it when you come home.
We have found communication to be the hardest adjustment with Jacob. He is a great kid! I know we all long for the day we can understand each other. Charades is a great thing to know!
Hi Doug and Carmi,
We will be traveling to China for our second adoption in the early summer. Our daughter will be close to 9 years old. Ever thought about posting a part 2 to this post?? I would love more insight on your journey thus far.
Blessings,
Amy
Hi Amy!
Congratulations on your upcoming adoption. That’s awesome!
Yes, I intend to answer all the questions and number 2 will come tomorrow. I promise.
